Breastfeeding timeline

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When I decided to breastfeed Clarissa, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. While I have enjoyed this journey, sometimes I have wondered how long it would last. As we near the two year mark, I thought I would share a timeline for moms who may be wondering what it looks like to breastfeed your child as they grow.

Newborn

My milk came in really quickly. The first night we came home from the hospital, I already had more milk than Clarissa needed. Pumping would have been helpful at that point, but my pump didn’t fit correctly, so I struggled with engorgement for the first few weeks.

For the first few weeks it seemed like she nursed every 1-2 hours. After a couple of weeks it became more managable and she would nurse every 3 hours or so. By the time Clarissa was four months old, she could go about four hours between nursing sessions.

Five to nine months

We introduced some pureed vegetables to Clarissa during these months. She would nurse every 4-6 hours and then eat one serving of vegetables in the afternoon when I was working. By about seven months we added a serving of baby cereal as well. During this time, she was still waking up to nurse once or twice during the night.

Ten to twelve months

Clarissa would wake up and nurse first thing in the morning and eat some baby cereal. Then she would have some pureed fruit or vegetables, some baby crackers, and nurse before naptime. She nursed after nap as well. She would eat some vegetables and jarred food with meat with us at dinner time and then nurse before bedtime. She would wake up once 1-2 hours after she went to sleep to nurse before sleeping for 8-10 hours straight.

Clarissa didn’t have any teeth at 10 months. But by 12 months she had 8! So we probably introduced finger foods later than most due to her lack of teeth.

Twelve to fifteen months

Once Clarissa had more teeth, we added finger foods to the mix. She would nurse upon waking and then have some scrambled egg with baby cereal for breakfast. She was eating more of a lunch and not nursing consistenly before naptime. She still wanted to nurse after naptime. She would eat dinner with us and nurse before bed. At this time, she was still waking up 1-2 hours after falling asleep for one last feeding, but then would sleep ten hours straight.

Fifteen to eighteen months

When I went back to work, I was nursing Clarissa three times per day. Once in the morning, after naptime, and at bedtime. But one day I forgot to nurse her when I got home and she never reminded me. So we dropped the midday nursing and she started sleeping through the night. If I had known that, I may have dropped it earlier! At this point she went to nursing only upon waking and before bed. She slept about 12 hours at night.

In January, Clarissa started playing a lot during her bedtime nursing and I was tempted to stop nursing before bed. But at that point, I knew we were moving to Korea and I wanted to be able to nurse if she needed it with all of the changes.

Eighteen to twenty one months

I was glad that I had kept with the breastfeeding when we got here. Breastfeeding during the flight kept us (and the passengers around us) sane. Then, Clarissa caught a cold like a day after we got here. We were nursing like four or five times a day again. After she got better, I weaned her down to morning, before naptime, and before bed. When we were settled in to our apartment, we went back to twice a day. She has been sick a few times since we have been here and so then we go back to 3-4 times a day and I have to wean her back down to two. But it is consistent. When she is only nursing twice a day, she sleeps through the night.

Twenty two months

Once she hit twenty two months, she shifted in her breastfeeding. Her morning nursings have been inconsistent. She will nurse one day, skip a day, nurse, skip two days, and then nurse, skip three days. I don’t think we have nursed two mornings in a row for the past month. But we haven’t made it more than three days in a row without nursing yet either. So we will see when she finally decides that she is done with the morning nursing. But her bedtime nursing has become very business like. She nurses about ten to fifteen minutes on each side and then goes to bed without a fuss.

Twenty three months

The day she turned twenty three months was the last day that she nursed before breakfast. Now she only nurses at night. I will say that since giving up the morning nursing session, her naptime is longer.  She still nurses between twenty and thirty minutes before bed. One day she decided that she wanted to nurse in the middle of the night to make up for not nursing in the morning, but I told her she was a big girl and she could only nurse before bed (sounded harsh in my head, but I know she needs to eat more during the day if she is actually hungry since she is almost two. I was fully prepared to let her cry for twenty minutes before nursing her). So we cuddled for a minute, I changed her diaper, and put her back in her crib. She cried about five minutes and went back to bed. She hasn’t woken up in the middle of the night since, even on days when I thought she would because she didn’t eat as much real food.

Two years and six and a half months

I noticed a pattern with Clarissa this winter. The more she ate during the day, the less she would nurse before bed. After she turned two and a half, she started drinking soymilk and some smoothies during the day. Not every day, but I was thankful that she was starting to make healthier choices in her diet. She started consistently nursing about 10 minutes at night. A week before she turned two years and seven months, she asked for milk in a cup during her bedtime story. I explained to her that if she drank from a cup I would not nurse her that evening and she was fine with that. That was a Monday night. Tuesday night she asked for her milk in a cup. On Wednesday night, I handed her milk and she refused. She didn’t nap or eat well that day and she wanted to nurse. That was ten days ago. I think it’s safe to say that she has weaned herself.

How to make mommy friends

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Having lived in a twenty mile radius the first thirty one years of my life, moving to South Korea has been quite an adjustment. I have never really had to start over in the friends department. But other than Tim and Clarissa, I only knew one family when we landed in the country (and they are Tim’s friends who live four hours away).

In the past, I made friends in my normal activities like work and church. But we haven’t really found a church home and I don’t plan to work in Korea. So I had to try some other ways to make friends.

Story Time

The first place that Clarissa and I ventured to was story time at the base library. I wasn’t sure how it would go since Clarissa was only eighteen months old and has a hard time sitting. But her activity level wasn’t horribly out of place with the handful of children ages two to five. She liked seeing other children, playing with new toys, and listening to stories. We have consistently gone almost every Thursday for the past four months.

This has been the most fruitful way for me to make friends so far. One girl I met actually lives in my apartment building (a 15 minute bus ride to base). Now that her baby is a little older, she drives Clarissa and I to story time and we do a commissary run afterward. Clarissa and I really look forward to our Thursday mornings with my friend and her baby.

We have also started having weekly play dates with another little girl from story time. Her mom and I get along really well. In both instances, our husbands also get along. I have casual conversations with many of the other moms at story time and I think there are a few of the other regular attenders that I would like to get to know as well.

Most libraries in the United States have free programs and classes for parents to attend with their children. Before we moved, wanted to attend a babygarten class with Clarissa, but my work schedule didn’t allow it. Libraries are also great for summer reading programs and family book/movie activities during the school year.

Bible Study

Though we haven’t found a church service that we like yet, I did find a Bible Study on base. I enjoy the weekly worship and fellowship with other women. The group doesn’t meet in the summer, but I am hoping to make some friends when it resumes in the fall. We haven’t had any play dates from this group yet, but have been invited to two birthday parties so far.

Churches are a great way to meet likeminded women. See if your church has a mom’s group or even a women’s group. If they don’t, start one so you can make friends. It doesn’t have to be a stressful thing. There are a ton of studies available, and the fellowship will be encouraging.

The Neighborhood

I guess you could call my apartment building a complex? It has two towers with at total of 200 apartments. Our building has both an indoor and outdoor playground. Clarissa and I like to go and play several days each week. We consistently are playing at the same time as some of our neighbors. The American neighbors are a little easier to play with at this point because they have all been under five. It has been great for me to get to know some other moms. There are a few Korean preschoolers as well, so I am hoping that as my Korean vocabular increases, we can befriend them as well.

Taking a walk in the stroller around your neighborhood would be a great way to meet friends. Are there parks nearby? Are there kids down the street you can invite to play in your yard?

Online

I have also made friends online recently. I am a part of an online bookclub on Facebook. It’s pretty informal but we usually read through a book in a month or two and there is discussion.  I have also recently found a Facebook accountablity group through the Make Over Your Mornings course.  Even though I am half a world away from most of these women, we have great conversations on social media.

Community Classes

Before we moved, I was looking forward to taking a few classes once Clarissa turned two. My friend teaches a mommy and me gymnastics class and there was also a mommy and me dance class at the rec center. The rec center catalog had several options of classes that parents could take with their preschool children for a great price.

Clarissa will have to wait until she is three to take ballet on base. There isn’t a mommy and me class for that. They do have a parent and child soccer class when she is three though, so we may have to check that out. There are probably more options available in the city. Maybe when I am a little more fluent in Korean we can check out some community classes here.

Note: There is an affiliate link in this post. If you purchase the Make Over Your Mornings course through the link in this post, I will make a small commission on your purchase. However, it will not add anything to your cost.

Language Explosion

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We moved to South Korea the week after Clarissa turned eighteen months. Since we arrived, it feels like her vocabulary has exploded! When we got here, she said like ten words on a regular basis. Almost two months later, she talks all day long.

When we first got to Korea, it seemed like she was saying “baby” a lot. It took me about it day to realize that she was actually saying “beep beep” for car.

Before we moved, dog was “pup.” Once we got here it was “puppy.” Then, every animal she saw was “puppy.” Although she was most excited about dogs. All of the animals said “moo” except bears and tigers. They growled. Now she knows puppy, kitty, bear, deer, hippo, birdie, duck, fishy, shark, sheep, buzz (bee), pin (penguin), and bunny. A lot of animals still say “moo.”

She used to make a chomping sound or lift up my shirt if she was hungry. Now she will say “eat” or “nurse.” She also asks for certain foods by name. There is a brand of applesauce pouch that has a picture of an apple with a face. She calls it “bob” because it looks like Bob from Veggie Tales. This week I gave her goldfish crackers for the first time. She has asked for “fishy” three times per day. She will also ask for cookies, bread, bananas, rice, and cheese. When she asks for her water bottle it sounds more like “bowl.”

We take a lot of public transportation so she says bus and “choo choo way” (train). She usually sticks with “beep beep” for car but will occasionally say “tar.” She also knows boat.

About two weeks ago, Clarissa started adding vowels to the end of words. First she added “uh” because a lot of Korean words end in “a” (kamsahamnida, shilehamnida, yugamimnida). She would say mommya, daddya, puppya. Then she started adding “o” (like anyonghaseyo). Now she says mommyo, daddyo, puppyo.

She also says:
Pee
Poopy
Sleepy
Seep (sleep)
Eye
Nose
Feet
Sock
Shirt
Shoes
Hat
Hair
Zip
Boy
Run
Hold you (for hold me)
No
Peas (please)
Help me
Moy (more)
Gas (eye glasses)
But (button or belly button)
Book
Read
Tub
Bubbles
Pay (play)
Side (slide)
Tub
Friend
People
Ball

International Travel with a toddler

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We just moved to Daegu, South Korea. Before beginning our travel adventure, I researched traveling with a toddler. There are several websites and blogs out there, but I thought I would throw my experience into the mix.

Due to the fact that we were moving and not just going on a trip, we had a ton of stuff. We were allowed six checked bags and six carry ons. We ended up with five suitcases, a pack and play, five small carry ons, a toddler car seat, and a stroller.

What to pack in your carry on

We had five carry ons, but they weren’t all for the baby. Two were for my husband.

The first carry ons was the diaper bag.

  • Diapers and wipes

Clarissa usually uses cloth diapers, but two months of diaper laundry during hotel life seemed too daunting when I didn’t know what my laundry situation would be. I knew we would be traveling for about thirty hours. I packed twenty diapers just to be safe, but only ended up using about ten. One blog that I read recommended overnight diapers for the fourteen hour flight, so I did that. But it really was a waste. I ended up changing her diaper every 2-3 hours on the plane anyway and now I am out of overnight diapers!

I packed a small pack of wipes as well. We used the wipes for diaper changes, washing her hands before meals, and washing her face after meals.

  • Clothes

She wore a long sleeve shirt, long pants, socks, and shoes onto the plane. I packed three extra shirts, three pants, socks, and a pair of footed pajamas for the trip. I only used two of the extra outfits. Clarissa never got sick during travel. But she definitely got messy while eating or trying to drink from my cup on the plane since she didn’t really want to use a bib. Choose your battles right?

  • Blankets

I packed a soft blanket for her to snuggle with and a receiving blanket for if it was cold. She never used either one.

  • Pacifiers

I had five pacifiers in my house, so I packed them all. Clarissa really hasn’t used a pacifier since our trip to Connecticut last summer. But I thought I would bring them for the take off and landing of the plane. She played with the pacifiers, but wouldn’t really put them in her mouth. She didn’t seem to have a problem with her ears anyway.

The second carry on was my bookbag.

I had a few things for me in there; my tablet, cell phone, a couple of books, and some pens. I also had some things to keep Clarissa occupied.

  • Small toys

I had a ziploc bag of small toys for Clarissa to play with. I packed a few toy cars, finger puppets, a couple of plastic animals that would fit in her hand, and a pair of sunglasses for her. She played with a few toys on the shorter flights, but didn’t really play with them on the long flight.

  • Books

Clarissa’s favorite book right now is a touch and feel book about puppies. We read that on one of the shorter flights. I brought five other paperback picture books, but we didn’t read them at all.

On the first flight, I treated myself to a magazine. She pretty much confiscated that until she fell asleep.

  • Notebook, pen, and stickers

Clarissa likes to write with a pen. She definitely spent some time on my lap writing in a notebook. She also had fun putting stickers on the page. Then, she tried taking them off the page and putting them on me and her daddy.

  • Tablet

Tim locked down a tablet for Clarissa with parental controls. He put a couple of movies on it for her. She sat on my lap and watched a few minutes of a couple different movies. She also spent some time watching the movies provided by the plane. She didn’t really like the headphones though.

The third carry on was snacks. I used this bag for snacks for all three of us.

Clarissa ate a lot on the plane. She ate two fruit pouches, a jar of chicken and vegetable baby food, almonds, craisins, and cookies on the plane. She also nursed three different times. She wasn’t thrilled with drinking from her sippy cup when mommy and daddy were drinking from clear plastic cups.

What we did

Clarissa is under two, so technically, she could have been a lap infant. But the government paid for her to have her own seat, so I didn’t complain. We decided to go ahead and buy a toddler car seat that was FAA approved for the plane. We don’t plan to own a car in South Korea but thought it would be a good way to contain Clarissa for a fourteen hour flight. We can also use this car seat when we come back to the United States to visit as she will need a car seat on those visits.

We bought a cart and bungee cord to wheel the car seat through the airport. We are so happy that we did. Our original flight was delayed due to weather so we were rerouted a different day to a different city. We had to switch airlines and had a ten hour layover so they wouldn’t let us through security and we ended up in Time Square. I don’t think we would have made it without this cart!

Security in our home airport was the hardest. I packed jarred food for Clarissa and some food pouches that were above the 3.4 ounce liquid limit. I wasn’t sure if they would make it through but decided to try because they let you follow different rules when you are traveling with a baby. They did let me keep everything, but they did a very thorough pat down and wanded my hands. The security lady said I could have had more items if I wanted to, but the problem was the size. So if you don’t want the pat down, just keep the pouches to 3.2 ounces or smaller. They didn’t care that the jarred food was more than that because the jars were clear. JFK and both Korean airports didn’t care as much about my items, though I may have fed her the larger pouches by that point so I wouldn’t have to do that again.

Our first flight was only about an hour. I buckled Clarissa into her car seat. She was seated on the aisle so that she could see everything going on around her. She definitely enjoyed kicking the seat in front of her until the plane took off. It didn’t really matter what I tried. She read her puppy book, read some of my magazine, but ultimately kept kicking. Then, she fell asleep once we took off.

During our long layover, I fed her a few times. I also let her run up and down the terminal for about an hour. Our flight didn’t leave until 12:50am, so I was hoping she would sleep well on the flight. I nursed her in the terminal as well. We tried a cover, but Clarissa didn’t like it. So we were as much in the corner as we could be. At that point, it was after 11pm and most of the people in the terminal were asleep anyway. I figured that feeding my baby and keeping her happy was more important than making sure the cover concealed everything.

I made sure to put on a new, overnight diaper before we got on the plane. We decided to put her car seat by the window, me in the middle, and Tim on the aisle. She did really well for the first hour or so. She stayed in her car seat and watched some of a movie on the back of the seat in front of her. She didn’t really like the headphones so she just watched the picture. I fed her some of the jarred food and she also had some cookies. She didn’t fall asleep even though she was clearly exhausted because the lights were on and the flight attendants were walking around giving drinks.

Then she started to get fussy so I took her out of the car seat. She spent a lot of time playing while sitting and standing in the area in front of her and my seat. The flight attendants then presented her with a gift. A little bag with a coloring book and colored pencils. She didn’t really color much. But she enjoyed taking the colored pencils in and out of that box.

After becoming fussy again (because it was now about 3am), I changed her diaper and decided to nurse her since she normally nurses to sleep at night. I didn’t worry about a cover since the flight attendants were beginning to serve dinner and I was sitting in the middle of the row anyway. By the time she was finished nursing, the lights in the cabin had been turned out. She of course, nursed to sleep. Every attempt that I had to put her in her car seat ended with her screaming. So I gave up and let her sleep on me.

She did actually sleep for about 6 or 7 hours. The problem was that she was sleeping on me so I couldn’t really sleep. Every time I moved to get comfortable, she started to cry. In the middle of her sleep she did get fussy so I changed her diaper again and then she slept another few hours until they turned the lights back on and started serving breakfast.

For the next couple of hours, she didn’t want to go back in her car seat. She spent a lot of time on the floor. She enjoyed playing with her car seat and eating snacks. She nursed again. Clarissa also spent an hour or two sitting on my lap. She watched about twenty minutes of a movie on her tablet. She also wrote in a notebook and played with stickers. She watched a movie on my lap as well.

I made her go back to the car seat for the landing, but she wasn’t happy about it. She did fall asleep during that time in the car seat.

When we arrived in Korea, we had to go through immigration. Tim waited in line while I chased Clarissa around the area. Her favorite thing was the moving sidewalks. The only problem was that she didn’t understand that they only moved in one direction. So she would get halfway and try to turn around and run the opposite direction. So I would pick her up, explain that we had to go this way, and then get off and come back on the other sidewalk. She would kick and scream. Thankfully most people thought she was adorable and didn’t seem too irritated with us. Eventually a man saw us with the baby and opened a new line just for us. I think that irritated everyone though! He called over everyone else with a baby too.

Clarissa did well in the airports. Even when she was really fussy on a flight, she was excited to be looking around once we got inside the airport. She enjoyed looking at people and investigating things in the airports.